(so I wrote this a week ago but wordpress is messing with me and it was never published, so here you are anna &friends)
Beanie said mama. She looked right at me and said mama. Okay maybe it was mamamama, but wow. Each time I think I know who she is, she gently reminds me that beings are so very fluid. And I even forgot about language! That it is a thing that she will know in a year or two. She is so effective with her facial expressions and body language, and still so desperate to communicate more more more. It was so evident at Family Camp, her love for meeting people and relationships. She was surrounded by love and smiles and giggles and cuddles at every turn from the 216 new members of her extended family. My own status as a Shambhala person or meditation practitioner aside (???), I am so fortunate to have such an amazing community. The week really did change her.
And me. Feeling the requisite openness and spaciousness, and also the moments when these things are lacking. Trying to bring it into my work and my parenting. When I wasn’t the minder of my celebrity status daughter (kidding), I was co-teaching a tent full of 6 and 7 year olds. I must admit it was not easy… we had a couple of bolters. My co teacher and I worked from Thich Nhat Hanh’s book Planting Seeds: Practicing Mindfulness with Children, keeping in mind the camp themes of kindness and generosity (if you think thats hokey then screw you). It was many things, but mostly an opportunity to practice patience.
Which I am in need of. For the first time ever, I am wishing August would hurry up so that I could start school. My job is draining me and I am really looking forward to some intellectual thought and believe it or not spending more time with my daughter.
Here is the other new world. My family bought a Canon Rebel digital SLR. It is made me realize that I am not a crappy photographer, I have just always had a crappy camera.
I realize you care little about my personal revelations and very much about Beanie’s personal/physical revelations (which is you read my baby blog, not my personal philosophy blog… which does not exist). I try not to get to amped up about milestones (they fuel my tendency to compare everything to everything) but there is so much exciting stuff going on at this age. Lots lots of babbling! J has always been on the quieter side, but during camp she really let loose with her pterodactyl noises and since we’ve returned its all about the consonants- bababa and that nice hard K sound. She is sitting up totally on her own- a couple of face plants and tips backward here and there- but we are out of the “situation room” (exersaucer… i called it the situation room because it had a phone that I would pick up and say urgently to her “Ms. President! The president of China is on the phone! All of the babies have misplaced their split pants!”) and onto the kitchen floor. All she needs is two plastic containers and a wooden spoon and she is all set. She sometimes tests out rocking forward onto her hands (she certainly is “thinking forward”) but crawling looks like it will be at least a month away (I hope… please she can she be stationary for at least my first week of school?!). Jolene is super excellent at grabbing and manipulating objects and grabbing and manipulating her mama. New foods? Jolene has tried and loved maple smoked salmon and cheddar cheese (both of which I hated until I was about 19) but won’t touch an avocado. And I though she inherited my good taste…